Wednesday, March 29, 2006

So it's worse than kidney stones.

Through being ill, some people find a devine relationship with the universe that was hidden by some materialistic obsessions. You might ask, is it the same for you Sam?

Answer: No.

Instead I have found the wonderful world of antibiotics, ultrasounds (ewww.), and clear liquids. Luckily popsicles are included in this clear liquid catagory. And what is included with popsicles? (Far too many questions in this post) Crappy popsicle stick jokes. To share one.

This one is somewhat modified:
Q: What animals can't do their laundry well?
A: Leopards because they can't get the spots out!

BUH DUM CHUUUUHHHHHHH!

wow i'm bored.

thee end

Friday, March 03, 2006

Wetness on the floor of the zoo makes me nervous. Like you know, you're walking down the middle of the cement and there it is, the spot of 'water.' I think it's all the wildlife or something, but instantly my mind attempts to decide from what animals and what orifice the excretion cme from. It could also be a zoo keeper with the daily filthy bucket of feces or wet food that got slopped. But then there is the off chance that it was one of the little kids decided they couldn't wait 'til the bathroom.
This is a completely irrational fear considering none of the cages are near the spot, and none of the zoo keepers bring food down the path of the tropics trail but seriously ewww.

I'm shakin' in my boots.

thee end